Sunday, October 10, 2010

im back!

1st off i got a new blanket
oh i love blankets
i am a happy girl

2nd
i had amazing weekend
got to see so many people
go out do things i havent done in what feels like forever
i really am just enjoying life right now

funny story from this weekend
we were driving back from the desert on a mattress in the back of a truck when we get pulled over by the cops. the boys had guns so the cops had to take them and then wanted to to search the truck for drugs. haha he finally got out his drug sniffing dog while we all stood out the side of the beeline hwy for 45 minutes..but those are the kind of things you remember.

this had made me thing about things a little. we had a good talk while sitting in the back of the truck. there is so much that goes on in our lives...the good...the bad...and the ugly, but what are the things you will really remember? what are the things that you want to really make count. there is so much the we worry and stress about but in time will those things matter and make a difference? or will we remember chill nights in the back of the truck talking with good friends when you needed them most. if made me think that you just got to focus on those things that you know when looking back on them will bring a smile to your face.

this is the time you make those memories!!!


ps CALIFORINA IN 3 DAYS!!

Friday, October 8, 2010

:)




so i spent my morning in the wonderful COOLIDGE AZ
my friend had to go so i went along for the ride
its defiantly not on my list of vacation spots but it was a wonderful morning

dying my hair today
i NEED a little change
exciting for the weekend going to have some great times with my friends
im going out tonight and wear my sexy big girl boots haha cant wait

i had a comment made to me
"you have been more cheerful in the last couple of days then i have seen you be in a while"
this is a wonderful sign
also i dont think i really noticed that because these couple of days have been hard
but it shows that its all going to work out and im handling it pretty well
life goes on and i couldnt be more happy about it!







.....i dont miss him.....i miss who i thought he was....




Thursday, October 7, 2010

yep

....went to class boring.....

wanted to drive by the temple on my way home... there was this old man driving down the middle of the street oh is little scooter he was on his way to drive around the temple grounds i couldnt help but smile when i saw him... and the temple of course

im trying to get back in shape...so for a little motivation im thinking about a half marathon. i dont know about that one yet but its a good goal right? but im lovin the sore abs today let you know you worked hard

ready for this weekend but not to work just for the fun parts

i have the most AMAZING friends who truly care about me. They have know just what i needed the last couple days and i have been so blessed!!!!

late night thoughts

so i was posting all of these things while i was gone and having crazy adventures but i got

home and stopped blogging. Lately i have felt the urge to start again so now is as good at time

as any. adjust to being home was to bad... its the adjust back in the social scene that feel weird.

i feel like as much as i had learned about myself im learning more now. Sometimes you get a

good perspective on yourself through the eyes of people who are close to you. Thing you need

to do and work on. Many times those things can to be hard to hear but when they are coming

from some one who you loves and trust you know they are for the better. I have learned that i

am a very strong person and can do things i never thought i would do... while in honduras i

wanted to come home so many days (like everyday) by the end of my stay i was saying to

myself "i dont understand why i am still here". Now being home and being in the real i have

realized what an amazing gift that is to me! This is a true blessing from my Heavenly Father.

Recently i saw myself in a situation where i didnt know how i could talk to a person or get

across what i felt i needed to. i was worried knowing what was to come, but when the time

came i said exactly what i needed and as i walked away though the outcome was far from what i

hoped for i felt such strength. In the days to follow i felt the same strength and peace....as much

as i was still not happy with the outcome i knew that it worked out the way that is best for me,

because if it wasnt i surely wouldnt feel the way i do now. its so strange how things work out

sometimes like you never thought or wanted them to.....there is one phrase in my life that was

told to me and many times it has been brought to my mind when thing get tough or i get

down...DONT WORRY ABOUT THE THINGS YOU CANT CHANGE..... but its so true it always

makes me stop and think "right, i cant change it maybe its best i dont, because it must mean

there something better up ahead"

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

OUCH!!

so its been a couple of days i know i need to be better about posting pictures i might just end up putting them of facebook. its so much faster when i do it that. so i have learned that it very dangerous here. they go about in the streets and kill people for no reason at all. they being the gangs they are call the M S 13. look that up on google image search!! crazy stuff. they dont care who they kill either. also i will NEVER EVER go to the hospital here. they dont have any money so they were on tv asking people for money. the have no meds to give the sick people. and they dont have enough room so when someone dies they just take them off the bed and put them on the floor to make more room!!! nasty nasty!!! one thing i am missing is the smell of rain. it might rain here all the time but it doesnt smell like rain. you know that we dirt smell. ya they have that here so it rain just isnt the same. kind sad.....we got a pizza the other day from pizza hut. ehhh wasnt a huge fan there just wasnt enough sauce.. but i guess i got used to having some amazing pizza at cpk. also when i i get home i want a good big salad! we cant eat any veggies that grow on the ground because they water them with waste water!! ecckkkkkkkk!!! so i got a little bug bite. i didnt think anything of it until.....it started growing, and growing, and growing. it go to be able the size of a tennis ball before i said anything.so we just put some cream on it. didnt help it it just kept growing. it got really reall red and hot. it started to make my leg sore. it hurt to put any kind of pressure on it or even walk. so off to the doctor!! so we walk in he touches it and next thing i know he pulls out a needle. A NEEDLE!!!! thats might be my biggest fear in the world!!! i couldnt even understand what he was saying....i burst into tears on the spot!! i had a full blow panic attack. crying, shaking, short of breath.....the whole nine. but they laid me down and gave me the needle...needless so say i was screaming. he said no pus or anything came out and pushed on it a little. the doctor gave me some anti-biotics. we will wait a couple days to see if it starts to clear up. if it doesnt he said he will have to cut it open.....and there is no way no how i will let them cut me open in FREAKING HONDURAS!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

¿como?

oh spanish.....you little devil you. Im still trying to learn. its just going so slowing. i need help with alot of the grammer and verbs. thats the stuff that gets me everytime. blah blah blah me whining about spanish moving on......i taught my first class by myself yesterday..scary....but i made it. there is a girl in the class who speaks pretty good english which is a lifesaver. the class i teach by myself has alot of younger kids in it which is great. they are the ones who seem to speak the most english. after class is over sometimes they ask me about going to see movies or a phrase they heard, and what it means or how you say it. i had a good little convo with a girl all about the twilight books. it made me laugh because she was tell he how much she loves jacob. oh its so funny how much things are the same. it rained again last night but not quite as hard. i spent all day at the school from 830 to 830 it makes my days ssssssooooooooo long. i feel like the days are getting better. when i can talk to people it will be great. i love skype i love at night being able to see those people that i love and miss so much. it makes my days so much better!i have a large break in my day and i end up spending alot of time just sitting at my desk. yesterday i got a little stir crazy and had to go in the hallway and to cartwheels and handstands. im thinking i could just roll out one cheer mat down the hallways and tumble. oh what joy that would bring to me!! BIG NEWS! i am have decied that i am a coke person. at home it never really mattered that much to me coke pepsi whatever but now that all the live long day i drink soda(which is getting super old but sometimes its better then the nasty orange juice they have some places) and so now i can say its all about coke-a-cola!!

Monday, July 5, 2010

rain and rain and more rain!


so as we left the houe this morning camilo says to me "its going to rain today" i didnt think much of it because it rains almost everynight. so i taought at the school ill talk more but that later but its starts raining in the after noon just pouring. so we start to head home a little later and it take us an hour and half what would normally take us maybe 15 minutes. its been raining so much that the streets and flooded and not just a little bit like the streets are a freaking river.(most of the water is on the other side of the street but that side is so full that it come over the median in waves) ITS SO CRAZY!!!! then we get home and they say its going to rain for the next 48 hours. i might just end up swimming home. but really i hope not. i have been a little bit sick i hope its just some kind of a cold. im going to turn up the air in my room so its not so cold at night and take some meds too. also i think i will be drinking more juice thats always a good idea. we went to the mall today also. its kinda like the mall at home. they were playing black eyed peas and the pussy cat dolls in the food court it made me laugh. the banks are at the mall too. and everytime you go into the bank they check you with one of those metal dector stick thing and check your bag. when they first went to do that i was so confused and the man looked at me like i was crazy and said something in spanish. we played a really funny game in class today the kids would come up and write there names on the board. with out looking at there name they would tell me the letters and i would write them. they say the names of the letter different and so we ended up with some crazy names. we would call the person by the name that they spelled and we laughed and laughed. which was a wonderful feeling just to laugh and smile again and to KNOW why everyone was laughing! i met the other teach today for the first time.....ehhh im not such a big fan she just likes to look at me like i dont know what going on. of course i dont know what going but you dont have to look at me like that! she speaking english to but would rather talk spanish around me and leave someone else to translate it for me ggggrrrrrrr. IM SURE SHE IS A SWEET SPIRIT! we will find a way to get along i know just not maybe the first day. SKYPE IS THE BIGGEST BLESSING IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW! i miss you all the hope to see (via skype) or talk to ou all soon!!! love you!!!!

Sunday, July 4, 2010

aye aye aye

today was not one of my best days. we went to church and the power was out it was so hot i really thought i might pass out. I hate not understanding anything that they say. they might as well be speaking in gibberish. i get so frustrated. i can home from church, laid in my bed and cried and cried........i know i need to give myself more time its only been a few days. but its so hard when i cant even talk to anyone. at least at the school im teaching people and helpping but today at church i was just sitting there feeling more and more lonely. its not that im homesick and want to leave. Its just the fact that i have no one to talk to. Camilo the man whose family im living with he speaks english but i bet we only sit and talk for 20 minutes a day maybe......im hopeing that when the other kids from byu get here it will be better and i wont feel so lonely. i just want so bad to be able to have a conversation with some one. at night i turn on my ipod just to hear english just to hear something i can understand. i spend hours teaching people english butthe only spanish i learn is what i look up and write down or try to study at night. once or twice someone will point out a word or teach me a phrase but its not like those kids i teach in class. i feel like im just trying to teach myself...ggggrrrrr it just gets me all worked up and frusrate and upset.......its not that i want to leave i love teaching the class thank goodness most of it is in english but people ask questions in spanish and the dennis that man that i teach with starts explaining( still in spanish) and i just sit there the kids will laugh at thing and i just have no idea what going on....im being so negitive i know and i should be i have been given this amazing chance to do something good for other people and for people that really need it maybe i just needed to vent a little get it out so that i can move on and i KNOW things will get better so little time has gone by i just need to be able to make it till them

Friday, July 2, 2010

Hola!

so my adventure started early yesterday morning, i got about an hour of sleep before i had to get up and make my way to the airport my flight to maimi was like 4 and a half hours which was way to long! when i got off the plan in maimi it was like being in another country there were si many people speaking different langauges and some people were speaking more then one. when i first got off the plane i went to check the screens to fine what gate my next flight was leaving. i walked up to one and saw that a flight going to san pedro sula had left like 15 minutes before i had landed and i tought it was my flight so i started freaking out. i have no phone so i went to the pay phone (yes they still exsits) and tried to call a couple of people but i couldnt get it to work i wanted to just sit down and cry!!! i took a minute to calm down and went back to the screen another flight had just popped up and it was mine!!! oh i felt so happy! the plane ride down to honduras was only like 2 hours. the airport down here is so small there is no place to sit like one bathroom its crazy. camilo and his wife were waiting for me at the airport and they took me back to there home. they are wonderful people!!! the room im staying in thank goodness has a small air conditing unit in it the rest of the house is quite warm. they have 3 crazy wonderful dog and not just little ones they are all quite big but i love it im not sure they reallt like me that much at least not yet. i cant log into facebook! it kinda feels like my life has ended.... it doesnt know where i am and keeps asking me for a code that they will send to my phone but oh wait.....ya i dont have my phone so it looks like no facebook for me if you want to get ahold of me the best way is my email i have great internet here so please please please email me!! i found out i will be teaching classes everyday most of the people in my classes will not be pre missionaries but will be the local church leaders. it will be crazy teaching these people who will all be much older and wiser then i am but im glad to help in any way i can.i get my own little desk and computer cute i know i will be working around 50 hours a week with classes starting at 8 in the morning ewwwww i hope that i make it! i really do want to hear from you oh my email is chanellejaz@yahoo.com oh ps the keyboards down here are different and i cant find the little at symbol so everything i have to type it i just copy and paste it from somewhere else hahaha ill find it one day soon i know

Friday, June 25, 2010

crazy crazy craziness

its now less then a week before i depart on my amazing adventure......im so ready to go!!! well that kinda a lie i have nothing packed i have a couple more trip to the store i need to make. im thinking it might be a good idea to start a list or something.....ok so im not that ready but you know what i mean. the hard things are out of the way i had to go get shots that was not a fun time i had to take some sedatives just to get through that(im a huge baby when it comes to needles) my passport is here...those are the big things. i have still been working which makes me even more busy. im still trying to work hard on my spanish! its hard stuff i try to talk to people at work i even have been watching nothing but spanish cartoons haha but i have to have some sot of subtitles. im all about a show called Pocoyo!!! i have spent hours watching sometimes i feel like im going crazy.  im sad to leave all of my friends but i think that the excitement that im feeling is kind of overpowering that feeling! dont get me wrong i love my friends dearly and they are so so amazing and yes i will miss but i feel this huge push from im not really sure where to get out of here for a while. i think it will also be neat to come about after being gone a hopefully see everything with fresh eyes. i cant wait for the amazing experiences that i will have there and i hope i can see change in my life while im back here at home come from the thing i learn on this trip

Monday, June 21, 2010

blogging?


Im now a blogger! woot woot! I never thought that i would say that. But see as i am about to embark on a wonderfully amazing adventure i thought this would be a good way to keep every kind of updated. So what is this adventure you ask???? i will be spending the next almost 2 months in San Pedro Sula, Honduras!!!! I have been very blessed to have such an amazing opportunity to go down and serve the people there. Im working with a group call One Life At A Time. the dates have changed a couple of times, i thought i was going to go until the 26th of july  but i got a call of couple of days ago and they need us now sooo...... the count down has begun...11 days its crazy but im excited!!! there is so little time now to get things done and i wish i would have been working on things before (like learning spanish) i did find out that i have a tudor for the first part of my stay. i cant wait to start learning!! im nervous and sad to go but i know how amazing this will be for me and how lucky i am to be given a chance to do something like this